Wednesday, August 29, 2007

I'm still alive

Which I guess is OK. All I know is that since my computer doesn't work you guys have missed out on me defending Micheal Vick. I think most of you know my postition on animal rights and PETA lovers. I can't stand them.

Saturday, August 11, 2007

I talk to an ant.

I had a conversation with an Ant
who mistook me for god.

"Whatya doing?" I asked the ant.

The ant replied that he had a plan to walk the entire length of the Universe.

"Did you know that the Universe is big?" I asked the ant. "It's 300 billion light years across. It will take you three days past eternity to walk that far."

The ant thanked me for the information, and excused himself so he could continue on his journey. "Seems like I've got a ways to go." Chirped the ant.

As the ant crawled over my foot, I picked him up, and squeezed his head till it popped like a pimple.

"God doesn't like gumption in little people." I explained to the headless carcass smeared on my sock, "Not one bit at all."