Sunday, April 02, 2006

Larry King Likes Lucky Charms!

It's my first post as a recurring writer of "the Bathos" and already I've made a leprechaun joke.

I have Jennifer Aniston's name tattooed on the back of my ass. Not because I tagged it, but because that's just how I roll. It's like whenever one of my Laotian Mini Wives is butt-fucking me from behind with a strap on dildo it reminds her exactly where she stands in the pecking order. Probably around # 169.

I am sure that you all want to know what have I been up to. Well, I have been secluded away at my Laotian Mini Wife Turkey-baster breeding farm. Inquire with an e-mail for franchising rights.

Many of you know me from my former blog -Larry King Blogs-. No thanks to Al-Qaeda that blog was shut down. 16 posts and 213 page views later and all I can get is the guest host shot?

So a more than just a few of you will recall my motto "My style?--Think Kyra Sedgwick in the Closer, but tuffer!" But just the other day I watched something which has got me worried about Kyra. It's her husband. They made a movie together called the Woodsman. In it the "openly" married man potrays a pedophile. Kyra inexplicably falls for this guy who thinks a good time is found conversing about Rainbow Bright with 11 year old's. Jeepers.

Lately I have been coughing up a lot of mucus, though when you turn 72 you don't exactly cough up mucus anymore, you cough up lung cancer.

474 Laotian Mini Wives were pissed off at this post.

Larry King blogs every thursday night at 6, when he's not too drunk he posts.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Friggin' A. 'Bout time the King returned.