Friday, October 14, 2005

Why I hate Wolf Blitzer and Why Tyra Banks Scares the Shit out of me.


I am certainly not the first guy to insult Wolf Blitzer's "Situation Room."

But I just can't understand how any grown man can stand and deliver lines like "We are getting live feeds in now on that overturned bus ..." it's beyond me.

Especially since live feeds means nothing more than television feeds from other networks.

Do we really need a stituationon room to inform us that Paris Hilton's new TV show has been cancelled?

"We are getting reports now that Paris Hilton has had a Tuna Sandwich."

The Situation Room is always "just getting reports." Stealing live feeds from Shobiz Today or that insufferable upbeat program entitled The Insider with former football guy Pat "Oh Your so fucking Hot!" Brien.

Which naturally leads me to this awkward segue, Tyra Banks scares the shit out of me!!

In her new program she plays big sister with attitude to a stunned and cattle prodded audience. Not that you would dare to fuck with Tyra. That's one sister who will put the beat down on you.

Tyra leans in to her guests who have some rather serious problems and fixes their mascara, she's a girls best friend. But all this good natured advice from a women who could snap any second and throw an alarm clock at you is unnerving to watch.

Trya Banks cares? She is like a rabid dog bringing back a dead canary to her master. You're sure you don't want to thank the dog, you're darn sure you didn't want a dead cananry, but the fucking grin on her face demands some kind of aknowledgement.

Careful where you pet boys and girls, careful where you pet.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Tyra Skanks is a fucking burden to television and society as a whole. What the hell does she do for anyone, really? I hate that stupid nigger almost as much as HO-prah! If these coons love the "motherland" so damn much, then please, do all of us a favor and take your porch monkey asses back there!!

"Just the Facts, Mam" said...

It is "supermodel" Naomi Campbell who has been taken to court a number of times for assault on her staff members, throwing an ashray and a cell phone, NOT Tyra Banks. Tyra is a completely different person. Naomi seems to be pretty much of a monster. Tyra on the other hand seems to be very sincere, caring and giving.

Romius T. said...

I never let facts get in the way of me insulting famous celebs.

Though I think the n word is a bit too much and if I wasn't into free speech I would censor it.

Anonymous said...

wow...sounds like the first person forgot to take their meds! yep, naomi campbell was the one who assaulted her 'maid', not tyra. though i hear u about wolf blitzer--can't stand his ass!