I don't know what people did before the invention of powerful stimulative laxatives. I guess if they were constipated they just sat around the jungle. Cursing at the gods. Eating raisins. And wondering when they were going to take a shit.
Not a lot has changed for mankind in modern times. Now when I get constipated I just chew on some Ex-Lax and wonder when I am going to take my 5th shit of the morning.
I just got back from I-hop where I ate some pancakes. I have no idea if the laxative finally kicked in or if it's the wonderful food they serve at I-Hop that got my colon going again.
But either way my tummy is now grumbling and my excretions can't stop. I've decided not to wipe my ass. As there seems no point to it anymore. I am just going to defecate in a few minutes anyway.
I've wanted to write a post on Kirk Cameron and his attempt to prove god exists on the TV show Nightline. But I wanted to make it funny and not preachy. But I can't think of anything funnier than Ray Comfort and Kirk masturbating a banana as proof that God exists.
I have to applaud ABC for dedicating Network time for debating the the existence of God. Network time, a washed up has-been teen sitcom star, and the guy who caught Micheal Jackson in bed with a 7 year old for a moderator.
I mean if these guys can't figure it out who could? Maybe Kelly could. Kelly has huge boobs. Kelly doesn't see why she needs straps on her dress to hold those suckers in. Even if she is debating the ultimate question of philosophy. Frankly, I have always wanted to find a girl like that.