Sunday, February 24, 2008

I'm not a pedophile, I just play one on the internet

I have a hard time getting a date. The closest thing I have had to a date this year is a text message from a 17 year old. The text message read "I'm a vampire and I need blood." I think that is some kind of code, but I'm not sure for what. I think maybe my under age text message girl friend is involved in some kind of blood cult. She probably wants to seduce me, and steal all my blood for her vampire husband. Well unlike you perverts, I am not at all down for that kind of shit. I'm old, and so is my blood. I can't afford give any of it away, because I think my rectum is bleeding now that I am eating all that yogurt fiber and apples. Either that or the peels of red deelicious apples don't get digested. Since I don't eat apples very often I can't be for sure what I found in my toilet paper. Either way you can't be too careful.

You can't be too careful. That's a saying some of you more advanced Chomo's need to take to heart. Like if you are convicted sex offender over the age of 25 don't go bringing your high school g/f to the prom, even if she asks.

ATHENS, Ala. — A convicted sex offender remained jailed Tuesday after the 25-year-old man, posing as a teenager, was caught taking a 14-year-old girl to a dance at her middle school, Athens authorities said.

Athens Middle School faculty members stopped Gregory Ray Brooks at the gym door because he appeared to be much older than his date at the Friday dance, Athens Superintendent Orman Bridges Jr. said.

"He didn't look like the 17-year-old he said he was," Bridges said. "The faculty did an excellent job of monitoring who was coming in and catching this guy. They kept him from other students and maybe helped this young lady out of a bad situation."


Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

"Young lady" may ass. That little twat is no "lady," if she was a lady she wouldn't have been dating 25 year old guys. And I may be wrong here but isn't the age of consent in Alabama 12?

Romius T. said...

I am sure you are dead on about the age of consent in bama!