There is no reason to repost any of this shit below, but I am going to do it any way. It's not like any of you are interested in learning about more about great stripper songs by UFO.
"You know it's been a while since I've encountered the soothing touch of a female human. I thought your foot was that little dog of yours that enjoys licking me so much. You know the one you trained by spreading peanut butter on your crotch. Seriously, that dog likes people too much now. It's sorta creepy. From now on couldn't we just leave the dog locked up when I come over?"
I am not sure if that is what you are looking for you when you Google misanthropic quotes but I love the idea of you spreading peanut butter on your vagina just so you can finally get some action. If the idea behind the story is a bit autobiographical then I apologize to stepmother's favorite cocker spaniel. But they don't name the dog cocker for nothing.